Honduras...pieces of my journey that have led me here

Honduras...almost 5 years ago I visited Honduras for the first time. It was my senior spring break of high school.

The summer before was my first time really out of the country. I went to Lima, Peru on a missions trip with Focus on the Family's girl's magazine, at the time called Brio. That first experience was everything almost everyone says about their first time abroad on a missions trip: eye-opening, powerful, life-changing. And it was. I had wanted to be a missionary/in ministry since I was little (largely because I just wanted to be like my parents) but the desire became real once I truly gave my life to Christ in 8th grade. In Peru that first time, God challenged me to trust Him wherever He would take me. That summer was the start of Him drawing me to Latin America.

When the opportunity presented itself to go to an orphanage in Honduras (Nuestros Pequeños Hermanos) with one of my favorite high school teachers, my heart burned with a desire to go. My mom always half jokes about my die-hard determination to go, that I wanted to give up my birthday and Christmas presents for years if it meant I could go :) So needless to say I ended up going. And indeed it was an intense life-changing experience. 5 days was all. But I don't know if I have ever cried as hard as I cried leaving that orphanage, perhaps even to this day. My time there ripped my heart open in ways I didn't know possible. There was one particular little boy named Diego who I came to love and bond with during that time. He has become symbolic almost to me of all that God taught me and did in my heart while I was there.

The summer before college I returned to Peru with Brio and simply came to love Latin America more. So in many ways my time in college was shaped by these times in Latin America and my desire to return someday. I ended up majoring in Latin American and Caribbean Studies, minoring in Education/became certified as an Elementary School teacher and studied abroad in Argentina.

After graduating this past June, God divinely orchestrated for me to go to Honduras to participate in a summer missionary internship at God's Littlest Lambs children's home through the LAMB institute. My time there was full of growing and getting a more real picture of what it means to serve children in orphanages/children's homes. God also showed me to deeper extents His own love for me as His precious child. I learned so much through simply watching the children and meditating on what it means to be a child of God. During my time there, the most amazing thing that happened was I was able to see Diego again. The story is a bit long about how God made that happen but it left me in complete awe and utterly undone that the God of the universe would care so much about my small life to give me the gift of seeing this boy, who had so touched my life, once again. Through that God deeply ministered to my heart and spoke to my soul that He cherishes my heart, the hopes and dreams that He has placed there and the experiences that we have walked through together.

Through prayer and counsel I am now heading off to Orphanage Emmanuel, which is an orphanage that one of my best friends volunteered at a couple years ago. It seems to be the place that has the greatest potential to be healthiest for me spiritually, relationally and otherwise. It is located a couple hours outside of Tegucigalpa and only 45 minutes away from where Diego lives at NPH. I will be at Emmanuel for 9 months as a volunteer. In so many ways I can't believe that I am actually going, that this is actually God's plan for me right now. There are many unknowns that lie ahead, and I'm definitely afraid. But I'm also really excited. More than just excited I feel hope, joy and an anticipation of beautiful and sweet intimacy with the Lord. I feel that He has so much for me in this next part of my journey and I long to walk with Him as He leads me through the lush pastures, beside the bubbling brooks, up the steep rock faces, and yes even through the lonely deserts. In His hands I remain His redeemed lily.